I have been meaning to write this down for some time and now that Samuel has passed his one month birthday it seems like it is now or never. I am going to write this in three parts – Before, During and After. That’s how it is stored in my mind and it prevents complete boredom by posting in chapters on my blog. 🙂
PART 1: THE BIRTH EXPERIENCE – BEFORE
It is a strange thing to be able to choose the way your child will come into the world. Not that it was really a choice. Thomas’ entrance was way too exciting for my taste and the resulting c-section meant that this time around we preferred to go down the path with the lowest risk. In 2008 that means a repeat c-section.
Samuel’s due date was May 24th so we chose May 19th for his birthday – a few days before the due date (less chance of naturally going into labour), a Monday (which I hear is a good day for surgery. Doctors and Nurses can be tired by Friday), and a day that did not conflict with our wedding anniversary (May 16th, not that we really celebrated this year. Samuel’s safe arrival was celebration enough).
What this meant was that for nine months I felt I needed to include a disclaimer when explaining my child’s due date. I felt an explanation was necessary to avoid being accused of choosing a delivery of convenience (not that there’s anything convenient about surgery). God forbid I be confused with Brittany Spears.
My answer to the question “when is the baby due?” often went something like this… “Well his due date is actually on the 24th but I have a scheduled c-section on the 19th. The Doctor says it’s safer that way because I had an unplanned c-section the first time around. Yes, really. They have done the research and it’s safer. Really! The doctor shared some of the bad things that can happen if I try a vaginal birth. Want to hear the details?” At which point I share some of the gory details and they seem convinced that I am not another person feeding unecessarily into the increasing percentage of births by c-section. In fact they may even be a little horrified.
Let’s face it though, planning my baby’s birthday was a hurdle for me to get over more than anything. I had to let go of the dream of having a baby “naturally” (although with all of the necessary drugs). I experienced the beginning of labour with Thomas even as far as my water breaking but I always felt a little cheated by the fact that I had not been able to actually “give birth”. There was also going to be none of that anticipation I felt with Thomas of not knowing when I would feel the first contraction. The anticipation was exciting and scary, but in a good way, and I was sad not to have that this time around.
In reality though, it was nice to be able to plan some things – my Mum’s arrival, early enough so that she could be there immediately after the baby was born, not having to worry about dropping Thomas with friends in the middle of the night, knowing that my own Dr. would almost definitely deliver this child.
BUTTERFLIES
I will never understand people who choose elective plastic surgery. The feeling of walking into a hospital in feeling completely healthy but knowing that you are choosing to do something that will make you feel like you have been run over by a bus is totally beyond me. This is how I was feeling on the day Samuel was born.
Despite my large belly and a little bit of back pain, I was feeling good. I’d had a full night’s sleep the night before, dropped Thomas at daycare, even managed to get a pedicure – I was completely ready. Surgery was scheduled for 11am so I arrived at 9 to get prepared. Let the poking and prodding begin. Blood pressure, urine sample, blood drawn, IV inserted. This marked the beginning of the indignity that is childbirth. At least this time I would be spared being helped up onto hands and knees with butt bared to the world to try and get Thomas to move off his umbilical cord. That was a definite low point in my previous birth experience and one I was happy not to repeat.
In fact the next couple of hours was very low key. While I was waiting the anaesthesiologist came by to explain the spinal injection – how it would happen, what she needed me to do etc. The last time I went through this I had already asked for the epidural so a spinal in the operating room wasn’t necessary. She explained that as the anaesthetic first traveled through my body I may feel a little dizzy if my blood pressure dropped temporarily which would be normal, but that otherwise I should be fine. This information would come into play later.
Then two hours stretched into three hours thanks to some bad scheduling and a Doctor who had to travel from another hospital in heavy traffic. By this stage I had read both People Magazine and Entertainment Weekly from cover to cover (couldn’t focus on a book), drained a couple of IV bags and was getting more than a little anxious to get the show on the road.
Finally the doctor arrived and we were all ready to go. I actually walked to the operating room which was a little weird, but I guess it would be the last time I would have the opportunity to walk for a while. Kei was to wait until the anaesthetic was all ready to go before he would join me. Apparently during this this time he just sat and watched my mum pace the floor nervously until they finally came to get him. I think he was grateful to get things moving as well.
Coming soon: Part 2: THE BIRTH EXPERIENCE – DURING… where I describe the strange experience of having surgery while you are awake and the excitement of finally seeing the face of the tiny little being who has been growing inside you for nine months.
Nicole Ishida Photography 